It's just like the Real World with babies
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
