Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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