So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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