If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
