Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
