We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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