i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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