we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
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