yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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