How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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