i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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