I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize