Where is the hickey?
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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