Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I need a burrito and a hug.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize