Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I think my fart just growled at me.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
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im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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