in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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