Umm I'm too high to move.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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