hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize
