why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
