That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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