Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Randomize