they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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