Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
