If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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