They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
cat food counts as protein by the way
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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