LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He better not be in your backpack
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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