I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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