You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
