i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
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