Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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