If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
