On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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