Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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