OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
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