I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
