somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
