Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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