Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
