i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
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