I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
