no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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