That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
