So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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