You're completely useless in the revolution.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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