i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
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