My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
