Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
