i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
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