Three words: puerto rican gang bang
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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