If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
So here I am, sexting at work.
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