We're facebook friends in real life
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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