im holly from the hills drunk
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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