Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
